Playing on Doubts
by SuperYellowSentai
Summary: It was supposed to be an easy hunt, a quick in and out, but Sam had to get an unfortunate visitor. FEM!SAM ONESHOT


_**1993**_

"Now all you have to do is flick off the safety." Dean instructed carefully pressing a gun into his ten year old sister's good hand. "Silver bullets Sam. Shoot anything that doesn't know the password."

Sam sighed and got a grip on the gun. Avoiding the use of her wrist set in a cast she pushed herself up in the seat. "I know, I know. Dad already went over this with me."

"And I'm going over it again." Dean pressed the matter. Although young his words carried out harshly. "The password is-"

"Betty Boop. I know." Sam griped pushing her brother away. "Now go, Dad's waiting outside the car with Uncle Bobby."

Dean looked outside at his father pacing impatiently outside the vehicle. "I know he's waiting, and he can wait a little longer, I want to make sure that your safe and you know what can happen."

"I know how to shoot a gun and hit my target." Sam said patiently, trying to alleviate the nervousness that leaving her behind on the hunt was causing her brother. "You and dad taught me how to shoot, clean, and assemble a gun Dean. I know that shifters can take the form of anyone, even obnoxious big brothers. And I know the password is Betty Boop. So go!"

Dean sighed and slid out of the car giving his little sister a long look. "Anything happens and you start the damned car and drive yourself to safety."

Sam rolled her eyes. "I'm not leaving you behind because nothing will happen. You three are the ones going to face the monster. Now go!"

Dean didn't move until John gave his son's head a hard whollop. "Your sister can take care of herself kido. The sooner we end this hunt, the sooner you can tuck her into bed and read a bedtime story. Now move your butt boy."

The boy threw a glare at his father but obeyed. John gave his daughter a nod, the closest thing to a warm hug and _be safe _that she'd ever get. Bobby ruffled the girl's hair and gave her a warm smile, before turning and propelling the boy towards the hill. Sam just watched as the three hunters disappeared into the tree line.

Just up the hill was an abandoned office building. A shifter had taken up roots in the place and had been causing trouble in the sleepy little town for a week. Bobby had alerted their father of the unnatural deaths occurring, and the two had paired up on the hunt. Of course while defending one of the potential victims the thing got past them. Sam had defended the woman the best she could but in the end the shifter took the woman's life and nearly Sam's, but John had jumped in and stabbed at the thing with a silver blade. Unfortunately the blow was hasty and it was only its arm but it left Sam with just a broken wrist and her life.

Sam lifted her aching wrist up and frowned at the cast. At ten, she had received worse injures from bullies and monsters, but this one came with regret. She could still see the light leave the woman's eyes. No not woman, Julie Houseman. She could see the light leave Julie Houseman's eyes. Dean had told her that it wasn't her fault, but what good was she if she couldn't pull her weight on a hunt.

Dean had been angry with her after they had returned from the emergency room and gotten the cast. Sam had asked the doctor what he had known about the woman. Being a small town he recalled the day that she was born. He told her about all the cussing Julie's mom had done when she was pushing. He told her about Julie's kind heart and how she was visiting home from college. How she was going to a prestigious school and getting a medical degree. He didn't get much further though, Dean had weaseled his way past the nurse and rushed right into the room. When Dean had known what she was doing he stopped the conversation.

"_It's not your fault."_ He told her, wiser than his fourteen years. "_Sometimes things happen. Sometimes you just can't stop the bad things. All we can do is our best."_

But Sam had never faced death like this before. She had seen her fair share of bodies, both human and nonhuman. She had killed a fair amount of monsters since joining her family on the hunt, but to fail and watch someone die from something she could have prevented was new.

Dad was going easy on her. When he thought she had been asleep in the back she'd heard Uncle Bobby and him talking about despite how hard it was it was a lesson that every hunter eventually learned. _You can't save everyone_. Which sucked.

The radio shot on distracting Sam from her thoughts. The opening riffs to _Sympathy for the Devil _started and girl gave a careful look around at her surroundings. She didn't see anything around, but in her world that didn't mean too much. She slid her hand over the radio's controls while her eyes raked the woods and pressed the power button. Surprise hit her when the music didn't stop once the power was down. Okay something was defiantly wrong.

The Rolling Stones were finally done grunting and screaming and introducing themselves when she felt the car jostle. Not expecting the motion Sam gave an involuntary scream. She ignored the pain in her wrist when she used both hands to brace herself.

Gun. Safety off.

She pushed back the fear and lifted the gun off the seat taking it off safety.

xxxOOOxxx

John rounded the corner gun first and looked down the long hallway. Ten minutes and so far the only thing the three men had found was a disgusting pile of skin and blood near the entrance. Bobby had taken the stairs, and John and Dean had started trekking the long hallways on the bottom floor kicking in doors trying to find any evidence of the Shifter.

"Stick close, Dean." John ordered something not feeling right in his bones.

Dean grunted, and stuck close to his father's heels as they continued opening and closing doors.

There was a sharp sound of breaking glass. Dean turned around and ran into the portly belly of Bobby Singer.

"Calm down, boy." Bobby frowned. "I just knocked over an old vase."

John gave his friend a glare. "I thought you were checking up stairs."

"Yeah, and I was finding squat up there. Thought I'd see how you two were faring down here." Bobby shifted the hold on his gun. "'Sides, sticking together is probably the best plan that we have on getting this guy."

John didn't have to say anything to the boy. Dean knew that something was off with Bobby. The way he stood, the way he talked, and especially the way he was holding his gun was all wrong. Dean had been around Bobby long enough to know the grouchy man's habits, and from what the boy could see this was not Bobby.

Dean lifted his weapon and fired. The shifter, anticipating the shot, danced away and smacked his gun smartly across his head. Dean crashed through the door next to him and flew into the room. John was worried about his son, but he had always trained his children to kill first and worry second. John brought his gun up and took the shot, the bullet going through the shifter's heart. John fired another round into the creatures head before rushing into the room to check on his boy.

"Hey you good, son?" John demanded when he crouched down next to his boy. He put down the flashlight and started checking his injuries.

Dean groaned and rolled to his side coughing. "Yes sir."

After his quick triage John only saw the small lump rising on his son's forehead. "Your good, Dean." John helped his son sit up. "After a warm bath and some pain medication you'll be fine."

"Yeah," Dean grunted. He gave a loud groan when John helped him to his feet and steadied him. "I'm good, Dad. Thanks."

"Now let's find Bobby and-" John paused when he glanced at the doorway. "Sammy?"

Dean's head shot up and he saw his little sister standing in the doorway. The only sources of light were Dean's flashlight knocked away further in the room illuminating the corner, and John's awkwardly facing the ceiling, but Dean could still tell something was wrong. His little sister was off somehow, and her cast was gone.

"Sam?" Dean cautiously asked. He looked to his father the question clear. _Another shifter?_

"Not quite." Sam smirked stepping forward allowing the light on her. Both Dean and John saw her eyes shift to be completely black. "But she's saying some choice words right now, you boys should really watch what you say. A ten year old has no business know language like this."

Demon. His friggin sister was possessed by a demon. "Get out of her, or-"

"Or you'll what? I'm afraid there is not much you can do in the matter." Sam smirked, the smile odd on his sister's face. She spread her arms wide as an odd form of invitation. "Go ahead. Shoot. I'm game. I'll stand perfectly still Johnny boy while you shoot a bullet into your daughter's frail little body."

Dean looked over at his father trying to see what should do. Demons he had dealt with, but a possessed Sammy was a new one for the Winchesters. John however was standing just behind his son a stoic look on his face looking about as calm as ever. Dean was about to get mad at his father when he noticed the gun in his father's hand shaking pretty violently.

The demon laughed humorlessly and pointed her injured wrist toward her head. "Funny thing is, your daughter, is unconvincingly trying to tell me that you wouldn't. But I can see inside her head, and I know the girl has doubts. She sees you as a ridged military father, who when he isn't yelling has a bottle in his hand. See I'm telling her that you would kill her; right now she's just another one of your _montsters _that you so passionately hunt. She's telling me that you love her, that you'll find another way. So prove it Winchester. Kill Her!"

John didn't raise his gun. His eyes stayed locked on his daughter his mind racing. The first thought that came to mind was distraction. He hoped Bobby was still upstairs, and had heard the shots. With the third man they had an escape route, for all of them. "Who are you?"

The demon possessed Sam stepped into the room and waved a hand above her head. The ancient building that had long since lost any power, lit up. Any light bulbs still intact flared up and illuminated the room. John and Dean could see the hallway even light up.

"That certainly is better. I hate the dark. I like to get out of hell every once in a while and this situation drags me back to a dark building in the middle of the freaking night. I guess it is just too much to ask for to have a little bit of sunlight huh." _Sam_ rubbed at her forehead in irritation. "Anyways, where were we. Oh that's right. You were contemplating killing your daughter."

"I will not shoot my daughter." John ground out putting space between his boy and his possessed girl. "I don't know what game you're trying to play but possessing a ten year old girl isn't going to do much."

"Oh trust me. It will do me a lot of good." Sam crossed her arms and looked in slight disgust at her surroundings. She picked up an overturned chair and brushed off years worth of dust before sitting down on it. "See, my _daddy_ has a personal investment with your girl. See she's important in the future. He has big plans for her, and the other children."

"Other children?" John asked sharply.

"Yes John, other children. Let me see if this sounds familiar to you. Mommy and Daddy put the baby to sleep and walk out of the room. Demon comes into the room." Sam smirked putting her hands on her hips. "I know you spoke with Missouri. She knows the details."

John closed his eyes and tried to calm his rising anger. First his girl gets _ridden around_ by a demon and now he was being schooled on the details of that night. "Why did he kill Mary?"

"She wasn't supposed to die. Had she left well enough alone then I imagine that she would still be alive, dealing with your sorry drunk ass." Sam once again pointed to her head. "If you want to know a secret, Sam remembers her mother." She ignored the shock on the two faces. "Not exact details. See when you're an adult you remember names, places, and people. When you're an infant different memories are there, you just don't know it. Sam remembers quite a bit about her mother and doesn't even know it. See the memories go like this. Yellow waves, Mommy had blond hair. Lavender and rose, a scent her mother must have worn frequently." Sam shut her eyes as if she were listening to something far away. "And the song _Hey Jude_."

Dean froze, and John's hand continued to shake, but he fought down the anger and tried to find a calm. He wasn't going to help his children getting angry and doing something stupid.

"Her mother really didn't have that good of a voice, but even though she doesn't realize why, the song still calms the girl. Oh and fire. Sam's petrified of it. Course she doesn't know why either, and she hides it well. It's a shame though that Mommy had to be flambéed when she realized her daughter was in danger and rushed in to save her." Sam's eyes flickered back to the familiar hazel, trying it's best to imitate her puppy dog look and failing. Even though they were Sam's pupils they didn't hold the same emotion in them.

Dean shook anger overtaking his emotions. "Get out of my sister!" He rushed forward, dodging around his father, not even sure what he was going to do when he reached his sister.

Sam splayed out her hand and Dean flew back his head hitting against the wall. John was confident his son was going to have the mother of all headaches in the morning before, but now he was pretty sure his son was concussed at this point.

John squeezed his fists shut and calmly walked over to inspect his son. He bit back any response that could cause either of his children further harm. Only once he was sure his son was still alive and breathing he finally stood up and faced his _daughter._

"I take it that you're on Yellow Eyes team." John had found out a while ago about the yellow eyed demon after a session with a demon. Only after the bastard was burning from holy water and thoroughly tortured did he even mention the name of the demon that had killed his Mary. "What does the demon want with Sam?"'

Sam threw her head back in laughter. "Oh please John, I know you have heard enough. _Demon army._ Sam is smack in the middle of that crap." She puffed out a breath and threw up her hands at John's horrified look. "You think I'm letting Sammy in on this bit. I've got her locked away. Daddy may want her in the future, but for now, he wants her to play the cards without any of his influence. If he knew that I let her find out any of this he would kill me, and I mean kill."

"Why are you here then?" John demanded his voice rough. He hated the helplessness of the situation. Where the hell was Bobby?

"I'm just coming to see what's so damned special about this family. I mean I just don't get it." The demon shifted and leaned forward in the chair gangly arms resting on Sam's knees. "All I hear is blah blah Samantha blah blah Winchester. What makes you and your family so special? He spends more time thinking about Sam than he does his stupid plan."

John noticed a flicker of motion at the door but didn't turn his head. "Sounds like you don't favor the plan."

"Dad has a way of selling ideas. See he is this giant powerful being and in the whole pyramid of demons I'm not afraid to admit that I'm one of the lower rung lackeys. So when he starts talking about his elaborate plan, we all nod and smile. But really I think that it's convoluted. He is relying on so much. Not just from your Samantha, but also from the universe. If one domino doesn't fall in the right direction, his plan goes poof." She shut her eyes and inhaled. For a few minutes John thought Sam was fighting but he realized that the demon was accessing Sam's thoughts and memories. She gave a hash laugh and opened them again. "And trust me when I say that the confidence that he has in your girl really shouldn't be in the plan. She's a nobody."

"I think the world of her." John griped, his hand fisting again. "Don't you dare say that."

"No really. She's a little nobody. I don't see anything special about her. And if you thought so highly of her why doesn't she know." _Sam _ran a hand through her hair and tousled it. The action didn't fit his quiet, shy daughter. "You see before I bombarded her in the car, she was abusing herself about that woman. It was as if the little brat hadn't seen a dead body. She was so sure that she had failed you, Dean, and her mother. Besides feeling like a failure, let's see, every second of every day, she also thinks that you hate her for the death of her mother."

John inhaled harshly.

"What you don't get John is she's a ten year old _girl_, and while she isn't out painting her nails and crimping her hair like every other little slut out there, she would still appreciate a little love here and there. Did you know that she remembers the last time that you hugged her? It was four, yes four years ago. You were finished with a hunt in Richmond, and at 10:00 you, after a particularly hard hunt, hugged your daughter and told her to _sleep tight_. She remembers that kind of crap. And I can count on both hands how many _moments_ she can remember."

Dean stirred gently distracting John for a second. His boy opened his eyes only partially there with him. "D- Dad?"

"It's fine Dean." John soothed.

"How confident are you of that?" Sam demanded standing up and walking over to the pair.

She had just passed the door when Bobby stepped into the open a flask in his hand. He flung the contents onto the girl and Sam backed away hissing and steaming from the contact of the liquid. _Holy water._ For once John was grateful to have around his paranoid partner. Bobby kept _Sam_ at bay with the water while he started chanting an exorcism spell. Demon was sputtering and screaming. Halfway through though the demon surged up and flung her arm out sending the hunter into the wall and cutting him off mid exorcism.

She clenched her fists and Bobby started choking and grabbing at his chest. For a second the demon collected their breath. "That is enough of that." She glared down at the older hunter and clinched her fist tighter, causing Bobby to jerk.

"You're right; that is enough daughter."

Sam spun around and paled at the sight of a man walking through the door. He was tall, and blond, but the most noticeable thing about him were his eyes. They were an eerie yellow. His eyes swept across the room. At the sight of the choking Bobby he threw his hand out and cut whatever connection the minor demon had on him. Bobby started wheezing and gasping, hand clutching hard at his chest.

"Father, I can explain." Sam sputtered backing away from the man. With the demon focused on her superior the lights in the building seemed to flicker and dim, until the only thing illuminating the room once again were the two flashlights awkwardly illuminating the walls, and the eerie yellow eyes.

"I certain hope you can. If I can recall we had a very clear discussion on how I felt about messing with the girl." Yellow Eyes tone remained light and friendly but John and Bobby saw through the façade he was furious. "If you can remember love, I had a harsh punishment for anyone who messed with my champion."

"Please Father." Sam was now against the wall, desperately looking around for a way out. "Have mercy, I wasn't going to hurt the girl. I just wanted to know what was so special."

"It is not your place to know why." The Yellow Eyed demon snapped his fingers and a cloud of black escaped Sam's screaming lips. The girl collapsed in a heap against the wall. The cloud though hovered over her and didn't disappear like it did in typical exorcisms. Yellow Eyes gave another snap and in a bright ball of fire the cloud burned to a crisp. Both hunters could have sworn they heard it screaming in agony.

Yellow Eyes finished with his lackey turned his attention to the girl. His eyes seemed to go through the skin surveying for injury. After a few minutes he turned to the shocked hunters and smiled. "Sorry about that, she had been getting a little unruly as of late I should have foreseen this. It appears though that the girl sustained no further injury, although I would take her back to the ER to have her wrist looked at again, forcing it out of the cast must have hurt."

John didn't say anything; he just raised his weapon fury in his eyes. "I will kill you."

"Please spare me whatever lame threat you want to throw. I just saved your daughter right now, I deserve a little respect." The demon frowned.

John's response was to fire off his weapon and hit the demon square in the chest. The demon though didn't look too shocked, he simply sighed at the rush of blood staining the ironed white shirt. "Feel better John? You have been hunting long enough to know that a bullet won't kill me. It's just going to stain a perfectly good shirt."

"You killed Mary." John bit out.

"Yes I did." The demon smiled. "I didn't want to though she just got in the way. I prefer to spare lives if I can. Now if you'll excuse me." The next second he was gone the spot where he had been standing empty.

John though furious, started thinking about more important things. He patted his son's chest before pushing up off the ground and rushing to the slumped over girl. He pressed two fingers to her neck to get a pulse and sighed in relief when there was a strong heart beat. He gently started tapping on the girl's cheeks trying to get her to stir.

"Sam! Hey Sammy, wake up!" John demanded in his most military tone.

After a few seconds his daughter finally groaned and flickered opened her familiar hazel eyes. "Dad?"

"Sam! Thank God!" John pressed his girl into his arms and leaned back into the wall ignoring his daughter going stiff in shock.

Dean was now sitting up with the help of Bobby watching the pair with a smile. He watched as his military father cleared his throat and released the hold. Anxiousness finally winning over Dean looked to Bobby to get assistance up. Dean groaned as Bobby pulled him up to his feet and shuffled over to his sister. "You okay, Sammy?"

Sam winced as she moved her broken wrist. "I'm good. Demon took off my cast though. It hurts."

"That doesn't define good Sam." Dean frowned and put a hand to his aching head.

John picked up her wrist and gently felt it. If anything the demon had caused more damage to her wrist. If the damn thing hadn't already been dead he would have threatened to kill it himself. He helped the girl to stand making sure to avoid jostling the injured wing and gave her a comforting look. "We'll get that wrist in a cast again. The healing time might be longer now, but you're alive and that's all that matters." John brushed back some of her unruly hair and gave her forehead a kiss.

Sam looked at her father in shock. "Are you possessed too?"

John gave a harsh laugh. He wasn't sure what to say.

"I'm sure your father is just concerned about you. You gave us a scare. What gives anyway, allowing a demon to get the drop on you?" Bobby asked. His hand slipped down into the doufle and pulled out two handkerchiefs. He started to form a little sling to keep Sam's hand from moving for the time being.

"Sorry. I was just in the car, and before I knew it this black cloud ambushed me." Sam winced as Bobby worked. Her head shot up and she looked at her family. "Which did I say anything? She shut me out and wouldn't let me hear anything. Anything I- she said, I didn't mean it. I mean she didn't- I mean-"

John shushed his daughter and bent down to her level. He smiled at her and ruffled her hair. If he had any doubt that this wasn't his daughter it was squashed now. Sam had gotten past her selfish stage a few years back, and now had more concern for her family than herself. A Winchester trait no doubt. "Anything said wasn't you. I know. Demons have a way of taking innocent thoughts and twisting them around to hurt the ones they love, but I've-" John paused and looked at Dean. "We've dealt with demons before, and we've dealt with fights before, but at the end of the day family is still family. Any words said can be forgiven."

He grabbed her good hand and sandwiched it between his larger ones. "Are you going to be okay?"

"Yeah I'll be fine. I feel a little violated but I'm fine." Sam's warm hazel eyes filled with remorse. "Are you sure I didn't say or do anything bad?"

John looked back at Dean giving his son a silencing look. Even if he hadn't Dean wasn't about to lay any guilt on his baby sister. Dean cleared his throat and gave a smile. "Hey trust me when I say Sammy, that for a demon, that bitch was pretty tame compared to the others."

"DEAN! Language." John growled.

The boy rolled his eyes. "Please, you've said worse with a stubbed toe."

"Dean." John warned.

"Fine, watching my language." He flashed Sam a smirk.

xxxOOOxxx

After a trip to the ER, Sam was given a new cast, and Dean given the all clear. The doctors told John that his son would suffer from headaches in the following days and a rather unpleasant looking lump, but he should be fine. No scrambled brains. Before leaving John received a few prescriptions for a Samantha and Dean Wilson to help if there was any uncomfort in the following days. John was fairly certain that there would be a large amount of uncomfort between his children in the following days. Just not in the physical sense but also in the mental as well.

It wasn't until both his children were in tucked in bed and snoring that he finally released a pent up breath. He sat on the second single bed and watched as Dean's arm snaked around his sister and hold her close. John wasn't too surprised when the boy refused to sleep in the bed away from his little sister. John realized the second he pressed the six month old into his four year old's arms he had implanted a strong protective bond in the boy. Some days he was proud of it, and some he felt guilty of how much weight he had actually put on the kid. He wasn't quite sure which one it was today.

Sighing and scrubbing a hand across his five-o-clock shadow, he pushed up off the bed and joined his friend outside the room. He found Bobby leaning up against the railing and looking out from the second floor at the eerily lit parking lot. Bobby only gave his friend a short look before reaching down and yanking a can out of the 24 count box. It was still sweating when John opened the can and drained half of the contents.

Both men didn't say anything for a while. They took turns sipping at their beers studying the little activity below.

Finally John broke the silence. "Thanks Bobby." He drained the remaining contents and reached down for a second. "I don't know what I would have done if-" John's voice hitched.

"Your welcome." Bobby said curtly, not really needing to hear the rest to know where the statement was going. "You've dumped those darn kids on me enough that I would have choked up a little if they weren't around to irritate me."

"I just can't believe that I froze. My girl was possessed, and my boy was in danger, and I froze. If you hadn't been there we wouldn't be here." John ran a hand through his hair letting out an angry grunt.

Bobby frowned and thought a second. "Think about that statement. You were under a load of stress. Anything said or done could have caused a negative outcome. Act too aggressive whoever was up in your daughter would have killed you and the boy. Act too docile and the girl gets away from you, potentially for good. Any father would have frozen."

John didn't say anything, he just took another sip from his beer.

"Oh hell, look at me John." Bobby grabbed the man's shoulders and took his attention away from wallowing. "You have come a long way from Texas. When I first met you, you were a mess with a toddler, and a seven year old. Now you're practically a seasoned hunter, hell, you're starting to surpassing me in bad assery. Never admitting ever again though, so soak up that statement now. Just because you froze this time don't make you a failure. If anything that's what the bitch that used your daughter would want you to feel."

Unconvincingly John grunted an agreement.

"If you really feel guilty, then don't wallow. Make sure that you make it up tenfold to those kids every second of every day that you can. They love you more than you know, and this one thing isn't going to tear your dysfunctional family apart." Bobby looked back out over the balcony. "If anything just take my word that you are twice the man that my father was. As messed up as you are John, I would have killed to have you for a dad."

John's face finally broke into a smile. He didn't say the words, and Bobby didn't need to hear them, but the gratitude on his face was evident. "I'm going back in to get some shut eye." John drained the can and crushed it. "Are you going to be here tomorrow?"

"Nah, It's just a few hours' drive, and I'm pretty awake." Bobby grunted.

"You sure? I've got a perfectly good couch, with a pull out bed. Wouldn't hurt to get a few hours sleep before the drive." John offered secretly wanting his friend to be there in the morning for whatever chaos was going to ensue from the aftermath of the eventful evening.

Bobby waved a dismissive hand. "I'm sure. I would much rather drive to my comfortable bed, than sleep on that mess of springs. I have stayed at this hotel before John. Trust me when I say that it is no five star establishment." He gave his friend a careful look. "If you need to have some R&amp;R though, the homestead is welcome as always."

"I have another job lined up." John said without a thought. "Heading to Colorado at first light."

Bobby tossed his bottle and his friends into a nearby trash can and sighed. "Ok, then call me if you run into any trouble." He yanked his keys out of his pocket and started toward the stairs. "And take care of those two. Those idjits are picking up your bad habits and I'm afraid for their safety."

John chuckled and turned around heading for the room. "See ya Bobby."

Bobby's face split into a wide grin. He had a feeling he was going to have to be a voice of reason for those damn Winchester's his whole life. As obnoxious as it could be playing Dr. Phil with them he wouldn't have wished for it any other way.

**A/N- Currently working on a few other concepts for my other stories, but thought I would post this oneshot that I finished a little while ago. I'm not sure if I'm making John Winchester a little too warm and fluffly, but I really enjoy the idea of family. Despite everything the Winchester's go through I solidly believe that they believe in it too.**


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